London, Diet, Pain, Suffering and everything else I love

I’m back from London, again. I’ve been there 3 times in the last 365 days. I’m growing quite fond of the place and the people. I was there this time for a tournament for Monica’s Wrestling Center.  I didn’t have much spare time to see sites this time around. I was busy with sessions and sessions and session…well pretty much just sessions. I met some great people. while I was out there. I even got recognized on the street which is always fun for me cause it doesn’t happen very often. I always happens when I’m alone and I know exactly why. People have common sense. They don’t want to approach me if I’m with someone cause they may not want to “blow my cover” hahah you know..maybe I’m with my rabbi or a church friend…you never know….don’t worry guys, I don’t go to church and if I did I wouldn’t hang out with anyone who was that judgemental. I’m really going off topic here. bah…okay back to London. I don’t really have much else to say about London itself as I didn’t really do much there. The tournament was extremely fun for me, especially my last match with Antscha. I had 3 matches for the tournament. My first match was with Xana, second was with Victoria and last was with Antscha. I was the only girl to have 3 matches that day just do to logistics but I was more than happy to perform 3 times for the audience and future video viewers. I had no idea what to expect. I have not seen any of the girls’ videos. All I heard was that each was very good and had different skill sets. I felt as if I went in as prepared as I could. I had just performed in a local BJJ tournament in Southern California and won the gold there, so I knew I had my skills down. I had my cardio up to par since again, I had just done and won a tournament in So cal. The only thing that has been throwing me off slightly to this piont in the diet I am on as I gear up for this fitness competition. I was 4 weeks out from my fitness comp for this particular tournement in London. I am on limited carb intake which means strength and endurance was going to be an issue for me and I knew this. I did everything in my power to keep my strength for this tournament. It was one of the hardest weeks I have ever had. I had three, 1 hour sessions each day and 2 out of the 3 each day was a competitive session which means I was throwing around big opponents for an hour….every intenese stuff. I was limited on what I could eat. I was lucky enough to find a great fish place down the road and I got to eat sea bass every day…yum. Also, I found a great Turkish food place down the road from my place and I had Sucuklu menemen or chicken kebabs for dinner every day….yes I’m sure it made me smell delicious. :). Indian and turkish food were my life savers while I was in London. By the time I got to the tournament in London, I was over worked, under fed, sleep deprived, jet lagged, and I was still a tough mutha trucker. I was pleased with my performance. I wasn’t happy with it but I was okay with it. I know I could have and should have done better which will always haunt me but I think I did well so I will let myself off the hook and not beat myself up too much.

So here I am, home from london and 2 weeks out from my fitness competition. I had to meet with my dietician yesterday so she could see what I look like. She was afraid that I would have binged while I was traveling….I was almost insulted that she didn’t know how deciplined I am so I giggled when I got naked in front of her and heard her say “thank god, I though you were gonna look horrible after your travelling but you are right on task” of course I am. pshha…come on now..Sadly, the hard part starts now. I am down to 1100 calories a day intake and it’s all salades and fish basically….I am required to do cardio 2 times a day…which is what I do anyway but never on so few calories. Everywhere I go I smell delicious foods and see people drinking lovely adult beverages while they lay out at the pool eating their bbq’ed meats…..it’s all very tempting and part of me loves denying myself those pleasures. I makes me feel like I have power. I control myself so well, it really makes me think I can do anything. Every day I train in my disciplines of muay thai and BJJ and every time I feel weak from the lack of food, I just tell myself that if I can get through today, I can get through anything. The next day I wake up, go for my 4 mile run and I eat my egg whites and small portion of fruit and I say to myself, ahh….this makes up for yesterday but it only makes up for it because I say it does and I allow it to. My mind and perception grow stronger and healthier every day. I feel blessed. These things that I could say are horrible, I chose to see as training and enlightenment. I chos